Location: KUTA, Indonesia
After our tourist binge in Ubud and the wedding in Medewi all we wanted to do was hit the beach for a week. Ideas of a week long boot camp aroused and dreams of getting in the water before sunrise every morning seemed like they could be reality. However a few things got in our way. First off Maaike picked up a nasty rash from somewhere. Things went from bad to worse and sleepless nights drove us to the hospital. Here the diagnosis was that the rash was either a viral infection of some sort or chicken pox. We are not sure what the rash was it could have been a million and one things even rumors of syphilis were circulating. By this time I had contracted whatever it was too. And things got even worse the chicken pox mutated into something far more sinister looking and the itchiness became unbearable. So back to the hospital again to pick up some stronger drugs to get rid of the Pox.
On top of this I spent most of the week running back and forth from the embassy in an attempt to extend my visa for another 2 months. My attempts however were made in vein, it proved too much of a bureaucratic headache to sort out myself. So i have been forced to pay a visa agency to sort it out. But despite all this we made it into the water on most days and even though the swell was tiny we got some good waves and had fun.
However the future is looking bright; The chicken pox is beginning to subside, the swell is gonna be massive by next Tuesday, my visa troubles are well and truly behind me and to top it off an extremely nice Indonesian man found my mobile and has kindly offered to return my sim card; of course he will keep the phone for himself.
Location: Kuta, Indonesia
You may remember maaike. We did the bungy jump together in NZ and she decided she just couldn't get enough of me and wanted to meet up in Bali. I know its hard for you to believe but I've been hanging out with a member of the opposite sex for the past week. They say gap years are meant to change you but this; this is a revolution of the soul. We have been doing a healthy mix of the tourist thing and surfing. We have visited a few temples and stuff all of which would have been complete disappointments if it wasn't for the Japanese. They are a nation of naive tourists and there antics continue to amaze me.
We were lucky enough to get invited to a genuine Balinese wedding, as my friend's friends was getting married. So we traveled 3 hours south to a small town called medeiw to attend the wedding. We got all dressed up in traditional clothing; I had to wear a black sarong, grey shirt and a head band thingy. Maaike was dressed in a darling pink top and shiny sarong. The wedding was not how i imagined it would be. We turned up and greeted the bride and groom and then sat down for some food. Hindu parties don't really get out of control, we spent most of the night in silence not really knowing what to say to anyone. After the party was finishes Putu, my friend, deceided it would be a good idea to go for a walk. Still in traditional Balinese dress we went to see the late night scooter racing gangs. The kids had some skills pulling weelies and burnouts really impressive! After the walk we returned to Putu's house in a quiet village in the hills of Medeiw. Me and Maaike were the only white people around for miles and when the unnerving chanting of the Muslim prayer began at 4 in the morning I began to shit myself. It sounded as the whole village had come alive, the prayer is a really low murmuring sound. We were huddled together in a tiny little room expecting the village to arrive at our doorstep to take us to be sacrificed. I was ready to leave there and then and escape to freedom. But as the sun came we realized we were safe and as soon as breakfast was finished we left for Kuta.
So back in Kuta again for some serious surfing and a detox. Peace! x
Location: Kuta, Lombok, Indonesia
So turns out the villages south of Kuta are in the midst of a war over land and recently there has been some murders in the area due to the feud. So things are a little tense right now but because of constant police presence things have calmed down considerably; which is nice. However my french amigo, Vincent, had some bad luck on his scooter. Driving through one of these villages he had a head on collision with a local on another scooter. Vincent's arm and side were scratched bad and he had fractured his collarbone; needless to say the bike was a write off. It was lucky he was wearing a helmet because the thing had scratches all over it! On the other hand the local was fine apart from some minor scratches. We spent most of the day traveling to and from the hospital in Mataram. The hospital was grim to say the least, there had been another road accident, far worse than Vince's, and there was some people in a bad way being tended too. They fixed Vincent up pretty good; put his arm in a sling and cleaned his cuts. It was a harsh reminder of how dangerous the roads can be over here. Unfortunately Vince couldn't come back to Kuta as there would be an angry mob of locals and policemen waiting for him. So he's on his way back to France now.
Apart from that incident the surf has been pumping, I'm getting more than six hours of surfing in everyday in perfect waves, yesterday I had a 5 surf session. It was killer but ladies think of the muscle build up; Brett Sergeant would be proud. There is meant to be a monster swell arriving today but there is no signs of it, hopefully it will arrive by tomorrow!
Location: Lombok, Indonesia
Today we got up super early, 05.15 to be precise, and drove 20 mins to the west to a tiny fishing village; Grupuk. From here we payed tommy, a local fisherman roughly 3 pounds to take us to the surf on his boat. We had a quick one hour surf and then went in. Tommy had invited us to a party in another village nearby. The deal was as long as we could provide 4 kilos of sugar we could go. So we set off with our sugar and drove for an hour into the depths of Lombok until we arrived at a very basic village in seemingly the middle of nowhere. I did not know what to expect, but the possibility of being ambushed and cooked for dinner that night didn't seem out of the realms of possibility. But all the locals were extremely friendly and treated us some real good food. The conversation revolved around surfing and Manchester united. Its amazing; so many people watch English football! The party ended as any good party should; everyone gathered around to watch a DVD. There I was held in anticipation, I coudlnt wait to find out what feature length film we were going to watch. So you can imagine my complete disbelief when a homemade movie came on of a young boy getting is foreskin removed. The movie was well produced with some interesting directing and i thought it captured the moment well, excellent viewing. After the party I went for a surf to clear my head, I got some good waves and went to bed early that night. It was a good day.
I decided to get out of Bali for a few days has there were too many distractions and a week of solid drinking was beginning to take its toll. I booked a ticket to lombok for 12 pound. The journey was long; a two hour drive followed by a 5 hour ferry ride and then a further two hours in the car to get to Kuta Lombok. On the ferry I met Vincent, a French surfer who has been to lombok a few times before so me and him have been hanging out for the past few days. He is very French and very clumsy and is English is not too good and my French is poor so there is a slight language barrier. We are staying at Surfers inn on the beach in Kuta. The hotel is aptly named as only surfers stay here, only male surfers, so there is a lot of testosterone bouncing about. Its kinda strange to because Lombok is an island less ventured so the best surf spots remain a a closely regarded secret. But I have managed to make a few friends who know Lombok quite well, so im getting all the inside info. haha!
Location: KUTA, Asia - South East
So I arrived in Bali about 4 days ago. The place is awesome, I'm stayin In kuta right now which is the main city on the Island of Bali. I got plans to move out to Lombok, an Island to the east of bali, because there should be better waves and less people in the water. But right now im renting a scooter to get me to the beach and back. The scooter rental guy hooked me up! He gave me a pimped out honda 125cc scooter. Its got carbon fibre trims and exhaust. I feel like a young scott allen, all i need to do now is stick a 6 by 9 under my seat and perfect my wheelis and ill be the hippest kid in town! The roads here are hell! there potholes everywhere, stray dogs that just chill in the middle of the main highways, mad taxi drivers that will run over anyone in there way and a whole host of random farm animals.
Oh yeah! and the surfs pretty good too.Today I surfed at balagan beach which is where insight made some of there zoup adverts. Check them out...
Location: YALLINGUP, Australia
So we met Leeroy in Morrocco and he said we could stay at his place if we were ever on the west coast of OZ, It was probably one of them gestures you make to seem nice and cool but nevertheless whilst in NZ we decieded to give leeroy a visit. So upon arrival to perth we rang him up and said we would be at his house the next day. Thankfully Leeroy let us camp in his backyard for the whole time we were there. We cant thank Leeroy and his freinds enough for keeping us entertained and full of beer for the entire time. Cheers!
Leeroy's mate, garth, gave us his old car. It was a Holden commadore 3.8ltr V8 with 350 000 kilometres on the clock. We had to avoid cops at all costs becasue the thing wasnt road legal, so driving into a rown was a no no! But she got us to the surf everday. The old girl gave up on us the day before we left but thanks to some mechanicl wizardry from Leeroy it was up and running and better than ever no time.
We had massive amounts of luck with the surf, we surfed everday day but one. I managed to pick up a few barrels too. Everyday we saw dolphins which was pretty cool, we even saw a taj burrow!
We even managed to get to some good parties too. Two days after we got into Perth Fake Blood and Sinden were headlining at a brand new club in the city. I managed to sneek into VIP by pretending to work at the club, so i got to pretend to be famous for most of the night. I was pretty bummed i missed Fake Blood in brighton so to catch him in Perth was sick. It was also ashes birthday, whilst we were in OZ, so we celebrated aussie stlye with beers and a BBQ. I think it was the only night he managed to stay up past midnight, otherwise he would usually have a power nap halfway through.
The medical care
I was blown away by the medical care! the day before i was schedeled to fly out of Australia i was like "SHIT! bali soon! im probably gonna need malaria tablets!" So i went to the doctors and a doctor saw me straight away. He prescribed me the pills and even fixed up my foot and sent me on my way. I was stoked as I thought I had manged to blag 100 pounds worth of pills for nothing. Turns out out im not as clever as i thought i was. The surgery manged to track down my dad and send him the bill. OOPS.
Location: Perth, Australia
Ok so New Zealand is over now and I thought the most informative and efficeint way to summarise would be to do a 'New Zealand by Numbers' sort of thing. Here goes;-
-7541 Kms driven. That's enough to drive the lenght of New Zealand alomst 3 times.
- 1 x earthquake. 6.1 on the richter scale.
- 1 x Tsunami warning.
- 2 x Islands
- 157 premature ejaculation adverts. There seems to be a massive problem with the male half of the New Zealand population. In every type of media, wether it be in magazines, day or night time TV, radio and newspapers, there are stupid adverts for a whole range of pills, remedies and other techniques to make sex last longer! So ladies who are looking for a good time in NZ, dont bother!
- 57 days
- 2 x cars
- 871 pounds worth of stuff stolen
- 2 x idiots
- over 2 grand spent
- 751 photos
- 1 quadbike ruined
- 2 pairs of flip flops
- 3 shoes lost
- 2 haircuts
- 1 Barrel
- Countless lovers tiffs with Guesty. Our relationship has gradually changed over time and now represents the relationship between a very old married couple; we argue over the stupidist little things, we dont have sex and occasionally we have the odd moment of clarity when we remember why liked each other.
- 68.5 seconds. Total time spent falling out the sky.
- 31 surfspots
- 100s of skateparks left unridden
- and most importantly 3 new facebook friends!
So there you have it; a nice tidy summary of New Zealand. Safety in Numbers!
Location: Dunedin, New Zealand
So basically cant tell you much about the last week; its been so much of a blur, not with crazy parties and mind bending drugs but with a whole catalogue wired coincidences and other amusing events. your probably like what the hell is he on about but I will never be able to fully explain the whole story, but i can tell you this;
I did go to milford sound, a really beautiful place about a 3 hour drive out of queeenstown. The sound is so picturesque and there are amazing views everywhere but what really impressed me was the Japanese. In London when the Japanese see a red telephone box they go mad and take way too many pictures so imagaine what there like when they see something decent. The only way to experence the miflord sound is by boat, so they we were, on a boat full of japanese people. I thought they may have a sensory overload and fail to function but no they enter a stage of uber tourism, taking pictures of everything. Not just amatuer trigger happy photograpghy either but carefully chreographed photos, capturing every view from the best angle with most of the immeidte family in the foreground. Wacthing the japanese at work was mindblowing.
I also went to queenstown which is the activity and party centre of New Zealand. Really nice town, quite small so everything is in walking distance. We stayed at the hippo hostel which has amazing views of the town and surrounding lakes and mountains. I did the 134m bungy jump too! I was so nervous leading up to the bungy jump but once we got to the place i settled down and started to enjoy myself, sort of. The bungy itself was mad a really wierd feeling no idea how to explain. I had to go first because i was the the heaviest, so i had to set the standard. Guesty wnet next and was as cool as the cats pyjamas, directly prior to jumping he gave the camera a cheeky wink. You will be suprised to hear that guesty has managed, somehow, to become even more cheesy than before. I, myself, did not think one single man could be so full of cheesness but he has outdone himself.Meika jumped last and stlyed it easily the best jump of the day! We also had a few good nights out in queestown.
I am now in Dunedin and today I saw 3 pengins and 2 seels! life changing! Next for us is Australia, we fly out on wednesday and should get to Perth that evening!
Location: Franz Josef, New Zealand
The surf report for greymouth looked sick; perfect conditions so we were expecting some real nice waves. But upon arrival we saw that the waves were pretty big and the water was really choppy and the surf was pretty crap. We went in anyway out of desperation but failed to get any waves as there was a rip taking you down the beach. So depressed by lack of waves we headed to the Montieths brewary for a tour. The tour was just less than a tenner and for your money you got a tour, free beers after for half an hour, an all you can eat bbq and a free pint! There was a could mix of nations on the tour, me and ash made up the british contingent, there was a canadain couple and a few danes. The tour itself was interesting but it was the free beers and food that followed that made it. Turns out Montieths is sold in Waitrose in the UK so go try it out its pretty good. I would recomend the raddler its been enfused with lemon and lime during the brewing process and so has a really light and refeshing taste; perfect fo an afternoon pint. and dont be fooled by the lemon and lime content its still an impresssive 5%. WOW!
So we continued our way down safe and we made it to the Franz Josef Glacier. The Glacier itself is just off the main road going down the west Coast of New Zealand. There is a short walk through a forest which opens up into a valley with the glacier at the very back. The glacier is huge and white, but there is a barrier about 100m away stopping you get any closer. There is a danger sign that hints if any inexperienced tourist, who does not know how to handle the glacier, continues past the barrier may unkowingly cause extreme spontaneos advancment of the glacier and the glacier may slide foward at a rate of knots and kill any tourist unlucky enough to be in the area at the time. The sign next to this one is slightly more worrying as it indicates the glacier may suddenly melt and the water created will rush forward and create a huge Tsunami destroying anything in its path! A few rudeboys continued on, ignoring the signs, risking life and limb for a closer look at the Glacier. However I was dettered by the signs and after getting a few quick snaps I evacuated the area immeditately!
Guesty was slightly more adventourous than me and opted to go for a days ice climbing on the glacier. So hes up there right now slowly edging his way up the glacier in the hope it does not turn to water. In the event of any freak accident he has got his surfboard with him so may be able to surf his way to safety!