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Método: Improvisación

Employed, time to knuckle down and get busy with it, now what I'm going to do is find me a better job and erase debt incurred from boozin' in Aussie every night.........

Does anyone miss me, I miss poutine and Wendy's Spicy Chicken Sandwich, I could also do with a Tim's coffee too, and lets not forget the Lakeshore Butcher's sausages.......mmmmmmmm

Diary Entries

Monday, 28 August 2006

Its been ages since I've been on a computer, so long that I've even forgot where most of the keys are, and this sentance has taken about five minutes to type. Some of you may have heard that I had left the country, as in England, to go to France, well I did just that and now I'm back, so there. It was nice, relaxing and...above all else French. Coming back up, I needed to take a wee right, the sign on the door was clearly for the gents, but to my shock a lot of the gender within the mens toilet were women......women who couldn't be assed to wait for the womens toilet. Crazy French, and to make matters worse is some of this women were alright, so I'm standing there thinking 'f**K me this strange' as I'm trying to focus on peeing. Anyways, Guy is back, picture of Provence to follow.

Tuesday, 01 August 2006

Location: UK

Hey folks, just thought I would say I'm going to work tomorrow, 227 days since my last pay cheque, a record for that will never be broken. What's more is I'm actually looking forward to it, what's all that about? 227 days was enough and now I will work my ass off and pay off some debt, the mastercard has been very good to me in the last couple of months and now I feel that I owe it some favors. Oh I bought a new bike too, bloody expensive but bloody worth every quid. I'm also looking at cars at the moment, something to get me around, currently the one I'm looking at it is about half the cost of bike, hahahahaha. Its on eBay for about £600, 1997 Golf GTI, pretty sweet ride yo, fingers crossed. Just thought I'd say I'm back to work tomorrow, I guess you want to know what I'm up to? I don't really know...hmmm, cash in hand, swivel tax man, swivel. No but its manual labour I think, I'll let you know, all I know is I have to ride 10miles there and 10 miles back, I'm going to be fit as a fiddle.

And one other thing, what is with you lazy people, I know I'm lazy but I expect better from y'all. Sure I haven't updated pics in ages, I'm tired of being a tourist to be honest. I'm still getting loads of visits to the site but none of you are leaving any comment, it's crap, get involved.

Monday, 17 July 2006

Two updates in one day? No, I got another mobile phone, and like before if you miss the sound of my voice just call me

078044 76252

I don't know about internation calls, I assume you would need to add 011 44 before the number, and like before get the time difference right, Toronto add 5hrs. Peace

Monday, 17 July 2006

Location: England

Well howdie doodie, how have y'all been? I'm just fantastic, I'm still unemployed, 7 months now and not a penny earned, how I afford it I don't know, only my mastercard knows. As most of you know I'm still in England, and England is having what could soon be the hottest summer ever recorded, must be because I'm here, I've basked in the warm weather now since late December. It was so nice yesterday that I went to the beach with a new acquaintance....yes England has beaches, beaches with sand and salt water, the water may not be as warm as some of the places I've swam in this year. But all the same, it was a beach and hot day and all of England went to the beach. Sorry I didn't take any pictures of the beach, so you'll just have to believe we have nice beaches.

I still been riding quite a bit lately, getting fit I suppose after letting myself go in Australia. But now I really have to knuckle down and find a job. Hopefully something will turn up by the end of the week. Plans remain the same, I'm staying put here until I'm required to come back to Canada for L & M's wedding, and that's all I have to say about that.

So I've been going out a bit more now, mainly in Frome, to those that know Frome you are probably cringing at the thought of that. Frome has a new bar, a nice bar, modern and popular with the locals, it even might attract outsiders to Frome. I've also been to McGuinness's people, how about that, I mean that's where my aunt and uncle met some years ago, and its still the same. Oh well that's Frome, some place never change. Your probably wonder what this Frome looks like, keep on wondering, there is no way I'm walking around Frome with camera, not in a million years. For the curious, Goolge Frome, Somerset. Its alright, it has it's nice bits and rough bits like most towns in England.

Yep the Italians managed to win the Coupe du Monde, and England did not. Oh well, that's part of being English I suppose, thinking every 4 years that this is it, saying 'we have the right players to bring us ecstasy', 'it is our time now', but no, no no no. We should always think that we'll do crap and lose on penalties to our most hated adversaries every time and we'd would be let down. But I must say England has the best support of any footballing nation, it can't not be compared or matched by any country, simply the best.

And that's it.

Wednesday, 21 June 2006

Location: England

Just a quick update. I'd like to thank Ross for letting me nick/borrow his rather good and a tad small mountain bike, I made use of it today riding out of town to a place I have fond memories of, Great Elm, and the iron works ruins. I had been back to Great Elm on one of my past visits but had not been back to the ruins since I moved to Canada, It was really cool, I hadn't realised how big the old operation must have been.

Anyways now I have a bike for a couple of days I'm going to make good use of it, tomorrow I will either ride out to Nunney, the home of more ruins, a castle, not an overly big castle, but a castle it is or was, at one point. Or, I will ride to stately home known as Longleat, home to a Lord, a rather weird one at that. Longleat is open to the public and has many attractions, the worlds largest hedge maze, and if it isn't the largest is was once. I'm not going to do the maze because I'm scared of lions, at 5pm when the maze closes to get the people out they send in the lions from the safari park. I would like to do the safari park drive and see all of the animals of Africa but I expect the rangers won't allow me in on a bike, and plus, the monkeys would destroy Ross's bike. So you can expect a few more photos in the coming days.

World Cup Report, out of 38 games played so far I have watch 37 in full or partially, the only game I didn't see is T&T v. Paraguay because England was playing Sweden at the exact same time. England has of course frustrated the nation with their crap play but have of course won their group and face Ecuador in the last 16, a no-brainer really. Back to the game then, Portugal v. Mexico, sorry Trev, I hope the Mexicans win.

Friday, 09 June 2006

Tomorrow I will have my first professional haircut in more than 2 years, no offense Giorgio. My God Mother Barb is going to have one of her spectacular girls crop my mop, I'll likely be the only fellow in the salon, which shouldn't phase me. So here I am, lazily spending my days in Frome, Somerset, been here for about 3 weeks, and as you can tell the frequency in which I'm assed to update is declining. For one simple reason, I'm lazy and haven't done all that much to report on, except today of course, Bath to me is my ideal English location, it is fantasic in all regards, should ever live in England Bath would be it.

Well tomorrow is the big day, the 18th edition of the World Cup finals, the worlds biggest sporting event, the best reason to go the pub and wear replica shirts and cheer like a moron. And you can thank England for giving the world this sport, you can blame Brasil for winning it 5 times, and England only once, forty year ago, 1966, beating W. Germany in the Empire Stadium, Wembley, London. Now it is time beat Germany again in Berlin, because football is now coming home. Come on England.

Enjoy the next month, I know I will, I'm going to watch every God damn game, all 64. Why? Because I can, because I'm unemployed, unemployed because I want to be unemployed, because being unemployed during the World Cup is cool. This how I plannnnned my year, the only deviation from the master plan is that right now I'm supposed to be in Germany, but things didn't work out, tickets were given to other lucky people. But the best place to be is in England.

Love it.

Tuesday, 30 May 2006

HAPPY 25th BIRTHDAY RON, present's in the mail, not really.

Miss ya mate.

Monday, 15 May 2006

Location: Darwin, Australia

In a few short hours I will take to the skies for a flight(s) to land me in Amsterdam, 4hour25mins to Singapore, 13hours10mins to Paris, 1hour45mins to Amsterdam. Well it should be fun shouldn't it? Australia's be very good to me and will shed a tear once the plane takes off. I will likely not return for many years to come, but I will definitely come back some day and do the things I missed. I may be sad to leave but at the same time I'm happy for the new part of the adventure. While I watch a cockroach run around the dorm room last night I though, I will be nice to be put up in a nice bad after 3.5 months living out of a backpack. So I can say I'm looking forward to Amsterdam, and the rest of Europe, but first I need break from backpacking and cockroaches. I'm immensely excited about the World Cup and England's chances, I fully expect to watch each and every game of it and then worry about a job after the final.

I really have to go though, this damned place is charging $6/hour to use the damn web, I don't want to even think about the expenses I've incurred from using the web all these months, probably not as much as I've spent on beer.

This site will continue to operate from England, stay in touch.

Thursday, 11 May 2006

Location: Perth, Australia

A riddle, the first person to guess the correct answer wins $10AUD or 2 beers, and maybe I'll throw in a boomerang, maybe.

Something black that roars in life and in application.

May 9, 2006 a date in my history, sorry mum.

Thanks Marc Pinto

Sunday, 07 May 2006

Location: Australia

In Perth now, and able to use decent computer, 2 new photo pages, expect more in the following days.

Road trip was alright I suppose, a bit rushed but what the hell. Right now I have only 2 minutes left so i'll fill you in next time, maybe tomorrow.

Come Tottenham, make me proud!

Tuesday, 02 May 2006

Location: Coral Bay, WA, Australia

Sorry sorry sorry. I haven't really had much of a chance to do any updating in a really long time. I'm probably won't do any picture uploading until I get to England, seems the Internet access is very limited on the West Coast. I have a full memory card of pics to share with you.

In the last coupla weeks I've made my way to Darwin, done Litchfield and Kakadu National Parks, seen massive man-eating crocs and waterfalls than most of you have had hot dinners. Currently campervaning down the west coast with two English and two Irish, its cramped and smelly but its fun, should been in Perth by this Sunday, knock around there for coupla days then catch a flight to Darwin for the return journey to ENGERLAND.

Be patient, shitloads of cool pic on the way.

P.S. if my language has got worse it because I'm speaking the backpacker language.

Tuesday, 11 April 2006

Location: Australia

Well it seems that My last journal entry wasn't posted, damn you planetranger damn you. So now I have to repeat everything again, so not cool, I have so much to do, my book is waiting for me and the pool is screaming for me to jump in. I just don't have time.

So by the 5 new picture albums I've uploaded you might have guessed when I am. I caught a flight to Alice Springs from Cairns ignoring the possibility of another bus ride with unforgiving distances. Bang 2 hours and I'm centrally located in the heart of the Outback. I expected a rush of humid air to floor me when the door of the little plane open but was indeed surprised at the modest mid afternoon temperature. Having no place to sleep that night I jump on a random hostel shuttle bus thankful not to have to pay for a cab. The hostel was a good choice, departing the next morning was a tour of Uluru, Kata Tjuta and King's Canyon, and I was the last person able to get on it. The first bit of information the guide had for us was the record summer temperature they had had. 28 straight day of plus 40c. Its a cool 30 as I type. Then he slams on the break as two huge eagle are feasting on some road kill, a kangaroo of course, the third I've seen in Australia. He quickly jumps out and grabs the carcass by the tail and users it feebly off the road, entrails uncoiling in a morbid scene. Unfortunately I didn't get a picture. SHOCKING! We picked up a rather nice family from the Ayer's Rock airport and uncommon event seems the tour is always populated by cheap smelly backpackers, from there on we had to watch our language around the kids. Outback Australia means stupendous prices on everything especially alcohol, but its not like you have a choice, you have to pay to play. Uluru was just a good as I expected, disappointed at not being able to climb the summit due to strong winds. The base walk was good exercise, around 10km. Kate Tjuta was more impressive, more scenic and a much more intense walk. King's Canyon was also just as impressive as the two mentioned and another long walk. The real shit thing about the tour was the early starts, the day we left I was up at 5:30, the second morning, 5:30 again and the last morning 4:30 for Christ sake. But the camel ride made up for it, even if it was only two minutes long. The entire tour cost $250AUD including food, not bloody bad. Hope you enjoy the pictures.

Monday, 03 April 2006

Location: Cairns, Australia

I left Airlie Beach went to Magnetic Island for 2 nights of zipping around on a mopeds with a bunch of us from the British defender (the boat). Seeing more wildlife, saw some fresh water crocs yesterday on a day trip tour up to Cape Tribulation. Not very big really, but I'm waited for Kakadu NP for the really big mothers.

Glen and Rich left me today to return back to Birmingham, they decided that the debt had got too big so they didn't bother going to New Zea land, they jumped on a plane home and their mums don't even know their coming home, I think I might do that when I come back eventually, It'll be nice surprise. So fare well my Birmingham buddies the last month has 'been emotional.' Fond memories of Noosa, Fraser, Whitsundays and every night night of bloody murder. I now go into detox for a couple of weeks, and back to 2 minute noodles.

About to book a flight to Alice Springs so I can do all the wonders of the Outback. The east coast has been one hell of ride, seen some amazing things and met some great people, the beach's have served me well. Oh and the Great Barrier Reef, best snorkeling ever, an amazing array of fish and coral, sharks, sting rays, everything, 28 degree water, as Massimo would say, 'JESUS, F**K OFF'.

They're is a lot of pictures I'm not showing you, once I find a computer that is cheap to use and fast at uploading, there will be a flood of pics for you viewing pleasure. Now I have to look at my credit card statement and that will make me cry.

Sunday, 26 March 2006

Location: Airlie Beach, Australia

I'm still alive. I hope everyone is enjoying the pics, more on the way of the Whitsunday's. I've had a heck of time these last few weeks. The Noosa camping trip was a riot, had an awesome group of people. Great weather and I finally saw my first Kangaroos, spectacular to see them in the the wild. Also saw some other interesting things, one of which was the deadly brown snake, had to be sure to zip up the tents at night. After a great paddle up stream and a 12k hike we got to this sand patch which was like nothing I ever seen, it was so cool, the pictures don't do any justice. After Noosa I went on up to Fraser Island, accompanied with Glen and Rich from the Noosa adventure, great guys from Birmingham. Fraser Island was amazing, it is the worlds largest sand island which meant there was loads of sand. I slept on the roof up the 4X4 the first night and saw the sun come up. Great lakes, lake Wabby was a hoot. Again another great group of mixed nationalities. MASSIMO... Lake Mackenzie was incredibly beautiful, pure and clean. Eli Creek was gorgeous to float down. Driving was super fun, beach driving was cool but driving the interior trails were crazy, my 4X4 experience came in handy the Toyota Landcruiser was great. As Mark says 'drive it like a rental.' Got up to Airlie Beach about a week ago, went out the boat but had to come back the next day because of the weather, a God dam cyclone hit just north of us which made things wet and windy. Hung around for few days and waited for Rich and Glen to get up here and we lucked out and got out on the Whitsunday's fast boat the British Defender. Another great group and the weather finally broke and we hand the most amazing time. Had the boat at 45 degrees barreling through the waves just loving it. The Whitsunday Island are beautiful, warm tropical water and amazing snorkeling and Whitehaven Beach was just like the photographs, stunning, and we all looked dead sexy in our stinger suits. The boat was so cool much better then the first crappy one I went out on, the only thing that was good about the Tongarra was the girl to guy ratio, 4 blokes, 17 girls, do the math. The really shit thing was the weather, me having a cold, and the fact that my glasses went overboard while sleep on deck. New pair of glasses $560 AUD. Shitty shittersons.

Anyways Its hard to relate how much fun I'm having the pictures offer only a taste of the time I'm having, so glad to be here not working just enjoying everyday with great people doing the same thing. Drinking Goon, eating tasteless food, meeting weird and wonderful people and laughing my ass off all the time. Take care people. I love you all. I love Australia. I just bought a Didgeridoo mom, the shop is mailing to you, open it up and learn how to play. Happy mothers day, I love you.

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Recent Messages

From Ron C
She's uh... she's got sandy blonde hair. She's uh... pretty good looking face, but I'm just getting really... just kinda TO'd because... I mean she hasn't even sent me a full body shot yet.
Response: Kip
From Ron C
She's uh... she's got sandy blonde hair. She's uh... pretty good looking face, but I'm just getting really... just kinda TO'd because... I mean she hasn't even sent me a full body shot yet.
Response: hahahahahaha
From Gramp
Hi there Guy
Thanks for the E mail Kiddo, a good laugh. Strange place France, full of strange people as you found out, we were worried about you, we thought it was the end of the world & you had fell off!. Remember the next pint is mine. Love Gramp
Response: je suis fine, and that is about as much french as i know...hold on, tres bien...yep that's it
From Terry

I love the website buddy! I can't believe all the shit you've seen and done since last summer.
Keep it up brother.
Response: Terry!!!!!!!! good to hear from you man. When I get back lets get some chocolate cake and fall over some for sale signs together.
From Ronalyn
thanks for your reply but be damned if I take pity on your sorry behind for your lack in overseas conversations again :(
Response: i'm so sorry, can i use the excuse that i was in a internet cafe and it was really costly?
From Ronalyn
Hi Guy, I guess it has been awhile but your right if we are to continue to enjoy the world through your eyes, we should aleast participate a little. It is wonderful seeing all the old castles and your history lessons that go along with it. Maybe you should go back to school to become a teacher in proper English history in Niagara but the peaches are early and sweet, the cherries are over with but were well worth the wait. The pool has turned green almost everyday...damn humidity...both kids start high school in a couple of weeks, I start again shortly after...Haven't won any Golden Lampshades lately, getting to old for the recovery time, but putting in a valient effort, how about you? On your travels you must have come close :) What are you doing in your new employment opportunity? Digging ditches or passing beer...more of the latter I going for a sauna now...more heat...but nice swim after :)
Do miss you...continue to have fun and play safe...
Response: Shit, is that comment a record length? If I just answer 'yes' to everything would that be suffice!
From Hi Guy
Sports update.
Although Beckham couldnt do it for England Button did.
Hit the pubs lads
Response: yeah man, FROME, the home of JENSON BUTTON (F1 driver), and more pubs than any other town in England (I don't know if that's true, but I heard it somwhere)
From Laura
Oh my giddy donkey's breath...Guy made a posting and he's got a bloody Job...give me a sec to peel myself off the floor.
Does the Golf have air-con?
Response: Yes, yes, oui. Working, posting, but aint drivin yet, when I get back though first things first, CAR, I haven't drove a car in months, kinda!
Response: ENGERLAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
From bhogal
way to go Barter
Response: eh? what?
Watch those circular saws, they bite Grampy
Response: eh? what?
From Grampy
So you are employed at last, congrats, however your logic confuses me. Work means money to pay off credit card debt, now talk about buying car & bike seems like more debt to me, or does 2 plus 2 =6 now ? Love Grampy
Response: yes indeed, 2 + 2 = 6, gramps you aint livin' if you aint in debt!
From Mum
Poutine, Wendy's Spicy Chicken Sandwich & coffee!!! where did I go wrong - its TEA not coffee that should be coursing through your veins. Plus I thought maybe you might miss freshly baked scones. Oh well good luck with the job, hope you have a helmet those English country lanes are more scary than the QEW. luv Mum
Response: mmmmmmm....scones, ahhhhhh, when I get back I want chocolate scone alright! Yes I have a helmet, Ross and I took one look the hills we we're about to go down in Wales and went to the bike shop to get kitted out. Yes tea is good, very good.
From 1 Eyed Grenouille
Hello Guy,

Since nobody else wants to tell you how much they miss you, I thought I would. I can't wait till until you make it back to the land of the maple leaf so we can enjoy each others company again. Don't mean to blow smoke or anything, but you know we were meant to be together. Until then, I'll be waiting patiently for your return.

All my love,
Response: I'm flattered, but you are you?
Response: French, Italian, same shit different pile.
From Will the Quill
I recently chastised Guy for being inactive, since the Footie thing has finished he has resumed writing up his diary but Bhogal is the only friend who has responded.
Come on you guys (& gals) show some appreciation & give the lad a little support.
William Shakespear
Response: damn straight
but don't fear, the page visit counter thinghy shows a healthy increase in vistors, I guess people are too lazy to write sometihng.
From bhogal
some interesting rocks used to build those castles...
Response: Absolutely Bhogal, old rock too eh? Aren't you impressed with my biking distances Bhogal? Nothing like you can do, but I'm getting there.
From Grampy
You may be interested in the Stowford Music Festival held 20th to 23rd July, between Farliegh & Wingfield.Waddies have brewed a special ale called "Rumpy Pumpy". Might get some ideas for your Web site. Good hunting.
Response: Rumpy Pumpy? I still haven't had any Scrumpy yet, I got man myself up before I can try that.
From Sam
Twood seem my goode friend Will was right thou becomethe idle Planet Ranger. From yon big screen in St Peters office it seems the last act of this Footie has ended.Yet still no worde in yonder diary. Time to take up thy quille again & start recording events for posterity. Thy fans grow restless for news.
Samuel Pepys. Diarist, Rtd
Response: Aye, tis over the football, sad to record another crap England outting, 4 more years is what I keep telling myself. So its news you want, then its news you'll get in due time.
Response: 2006, ok well deserved, 1982 ok you probably earned it, 1938 only 16 nations took part and the tournament was over in 18 matches, 1934 was the same but Italy were hosts. So I only count two of those stars to be valid. England was too snobby to get involved in the World Cup until 1950, mainly because FIFA was run by Frenchmen.
From Mum
Neolithic Tomb! where the hell is that? And did I miss something, I thought Shakespeare had died.
lv Mum, alive and well in sunny Ontario.
Response: The Neolithic Tomb is near Stoney Littleton down the hill from Norton Saint Philip. I'm not sure who Shakespeare is but I have an idea.

I'm nervous now, two hour before it all kicks off, it's sweltering here, time get into the beer.

" The game's afoot: Follow your spirit, and upon this charge Cry 'God for Harry, England, and Saint George' "

come on £ngland
From Where is the Quill ?
Methinks yon Planet Ranger has become a couch potato,
too absorbed in this weird spectacle they call Footie, where men dress like Morris dancers & chase a pigs bladder around a meadow.
Come young sirrah, pick up thy quill & continue writing that diary, thy fans deserve it.
Yr servant.
William Shakespeare
Response: What are you talking about Willie? Maybe the blogs have slowed a wee bit but please notice the influx of picture galleries filled with good information on local heritage sites.
From Secret
i like you long time, i think you so sexy
Response: hmmmm...thanks?
From Mum
wow you know more history than me!!! very impressive
luv Mum
Response: I research a lot
From Mum
You are making me home sick. Fab photos, please keep them coming.
luv Mum
Response: Went to King Alfred's Tower and Stourhead today, more coming