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The Frannies

Sorry we haven't upated the website for a while, we are now in a remote island in the Bahamas called Long Island and internet access is very slow and very expensive, you can however check our our beautiful accomodation at the following website we even have our own private beach! We have even more nightmarish tales to upload so we feel we deserve luxury now!

love marge and ian xxx

Diary Entries

Sunday, 12 March 2006

Location: *NORTHERN BRASIL*, Brazil

*NORTHERN BRASIL* - 12/03/06 - 19/03/06



Got a plane to a place called Natal and then a bus to a beautiful place on the coast called Praira do Pipa. The views on the 1 1/2 hour bus ride were gorgeous, and it was looking more and more like the caribbean as we approached Pipa. Got there failry late o just got a room, changed clothes and went out for some tapas and for a night out on the town, well village..



Woke up hungover obviouly, but the view that greeted us when we awoke was so stunning that we soon forgot all about our bad heads. Pipa is the sort of place where you feel like you have really stumbled upon a rare jewel of a place that not many people know about and is totally unspoilt and still very beautiful. It felt like we had found the map to "The Beach" in the sense that it was unknown. Ian didn't like the water coz it was too warm, it was like stepping into a warm bath, I loved it though as the waves were the type that you can just bob along on and not get wiped out unawares by a massive wave!

Went for a lovely meal on the ocean front. The experince was slightly tained by the fact that there were the most gigantic moths I have ever ever EVER seen in my entire life, seriously they were MASSIVE and horrible. I sat quite patiently surrounded by them until they woke up and started darting around the table, one even landed on Ian's arm, I was obviously observing the commotion from afar - terrified!


Had another lovely day by the beach. Watched the sunset at a beachbar that was cut off by the tides - perfect.


Went and did some sunbathing on a nearby beach called "Dolphino" where Dolphins are supposed to come in very close to the short and feed on the fish, we didn't see any though!


NATAL (again)

Although we had out bus tickets booked for our delightful 40 hour journey, on the bus back to Natal we decided to look at flight just out of interest... we found that there was a flight for next to nothing... we contemplated what to do and again decided not to bother with a bus and to opt for a flight, it was too cheap not to do it! The only catch was that it only left at 02.10am! It was only midday, Sooo we hung around in the airport until 2am, 14 hours!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!- !!



Landed at a place called Belem at about 6.00am, our onward flight was only at 10.20pm, so again we were forced to hang round in the airport for another 14 hours!!! I was seriously beginning to feel like we were in the film "The Terminal"!!! Although at the time it was the best and fastest options to fly, it turned out to be a frigging nightmare in the end.



Finally got to Manaus, a place in the middle of the jungle. Had a F**ing nightmare there too. Went to the bus station to book our 32 hour bus to Venezuela only to be told that there had been so much rain that a landslide had occurred and the road out of Brasil to Venezuela was closed and flooded, or had collapsed or something like that, basically we couldn't get the bus there. All the effort we had made to get our flight out of Caracas and we were going to miss it - great.

AAAARRRRGFGGhhhhh, by this point me and Ian are totally, utterly and majorly PISSED OFF. We tried to get flight only to be told that no airlines fly to Venezeula, so that was it! We were stuck in Manaus!

I was in tears, Ian was totally pissed off, we were just generally defeated until we went to the travel agent. We were just sooo pissed off with travelling and hardship that we decided that the only option was to get a direct flight to Miami and to pick up the rest of our flights as planned after the caribbean. We were happy once more that we would be going back to civilisation, slightly early but never mind we were DEFINATELY ready!

Saturday, 04 March 2006

Location: *Rio De Janeiro - BRASIL*, Brazil

*Rio De Janeiro - BRASIL* 05/03/06 - 11/03/06


Got a 24 hour bus to Rio, had a nightmare with the Nun´s in front of us who put their seat back as far as it could possibly go as soon as they got on the bus in the day time until we got off at Rio. I now officialy hate Nun´s! All in all a very crap journey, the air-con packed up as soon as the sun came up and everyone on the bus was absolutely sweating to death, I know that you won´t give us any sympathy given the weather in England at the moment but it was truly unbearable! The ONLY thing that got me through the journey was my Sudoku book, thank god for sudoku it has saved me from crying, going mad from boredom on quite a few occassions now.


Arrived at Rio bus terminal which wasn´t the most plesant of experiences. It is a pretty dodgy place as its in Downtown Rio which is a rough area. Ian went to look for a `safe taxi` while I as usual minded the bags, I could actually see the robbers eyeing up people it was pretty freaky.

Found a `safe taxi` and headed straight for the apartment where we were going to stay with Jane and Dade. Had a bit of palavar trying to find it but eventually got to the famous Copacabana area, met up with Jane and Dade (who were absolutely black from their 3 weeks in Rio), went shopping for some food and then proceeded to get completely bladdered on Dade´s extremely potent Moijito´s! A great night was had by all, especially me and Dade who were up till 4am!


Ian´s Birthday!! Got up slightly worse for wear because of the night before, went to check for our post as we were having some important stuff sent through for the sale of the flat. Got to the post office after paying a fortune in a cab - no post. Three packages sent at different times all missing - Gutted. Not a very good start to Ians day.

The weather was also crap so we couldn´t go down to the beach and sunbathe, so we just wandered around Rio. I prepared Ian a birthday meal - spag bol, gave him is present - a pair of `Havaianas` (famous Brasilian flip flops that cost a fortune in Shellys and such like), sang happy birthday and got him a massive candle to blow out. It wasn´t the best birthday he´s ever had but at least it was in Rio!


Got up really early to see Jane and Dade off to the airport, it was really nice spending time with them and having an apartment and some normality.

It was absolutely scorchio that day so we headed down to Ipenema beach, absolutely beautiful. Ipenema is a much much nicer beach than Copacabana plus its a lot safer.



Sunbathed and got drunk on beach.


Met our Irish friends Pat and Dee who had just arrived in Rio and were going to share our apartment. They broke the news that they had got engaged at Iguazu Falls, very very romantic. We were the first ones that they had told!!

Had a celebration meal and a few too many drinks again, Ian was pissed and we have some very funny footage of Ian and Pat I will have to show you when I get home. If I didn´t know any better I would think that Ian was gay!


Woke up with a hangover obviously. Had to have maccy d´s to rectify this as we were going to see the statue of `Christ the Redeemer`. Another absolutely scorching hot day (sorry to rub it in but it was!!!). Got a taxi and then this mad little train up to the top of where HE is. The views were absolutely amazing and the statue was really impressive. In fact I was surprised to see how good looking they had made Jesus!! I immediately felt like I was going to go to Hell for saying that Jesus looked fit on the statue!!!! Got some fab pictures. Had a domino´s for tea, Ian was well chuffed with that.


YAWN....another day down the beach.

Wednesday, 01 March 2006

Location: *Iguazu Falls - BRASIL*, Brazil

*Iguazu Falls - BRASIL* 01/03/06 - 04/03/06


Got to Iguazu after our NIGHTMARE journey, it was absolutely torrential rain. Went to the internet shop to try and find some accomodation. While we were there just out of interest we looked at a the 7-day weather forecast for Igauzu, it said that it would be thunderstorms for a week. I burst into tears, I couldn´t believe that after all this effort and hardship, I would not get to see Iguazu properly, I was absolutely gutted and convinced that there was a higher force controlling our shit destiny for the past week or so. I was a total victim! After much discussion about sacking the whole venture off and just leaving for Rio, we decided to just stay there anyway to recharge our batteries in a 5* hotel!

Our hotel was absolutely lovely, we were happy even though it was pissing it down still. After a while Ian convinced me that the Falls would still be worth seeing even in a bloody thunderstorm. I eventually agreed to still go and see them, so we booked the Brasil tour for the next day.

I had a bit of a crazy experience but it is not something that I can put onto the website, I will explain it to a fortunate few upon my return!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The rest of the night was spent enjoying room service and films, football and `Changing Rooms`! on cable tv.


Woke up to a very bright day and not a hint of a storm, maybe the weather forecast had been wrong. Little did we know that when we booked our tour through the hotel that we would be the only ones on `the tour` and would enjoy our own personal chauffeur to the falls!! Fantastic!! We got there, jumped queues, got driven around everywhere and just generally felt special, it was very very nice.

Still no sign of rain or storms as we approached the national park. Our first sight of the Falls was great but neither of us were THAT impressed, Ian has seen Niagra and he said that these were crap compared to them. We walked along side many of the 300 or so waterfalls that make up Iguazu and then we got to the reason that everyone raves on about them - `Garganta do Diabalo` roughly translated as `The Devils Throat` - all I can say is WOW, I haven´t been to Niagra and was completely overawed with the force of these falls, Ian then admitted that these Falls were a million times more impressive than Niagra!

We had a really great time, again the pictures don´t show the true beauty but we have videoclips of the place too. Enjoyed an hour or so at the big fall and then got driven back to our hotel ready to view it from the Argentinian side the day after.

Oh and it didn´t rain apart from a tiny bit just as we were about to leave!!

*Iguazu Falls - ARGENTINA* 03/03/06

Another bright, even better day than yesterday greeted us when we woke. Had another fantastic breakfast at the hotel, everything that you could wish for on offer, even free champagne! Hopped into the car again, it was the same guy taking us to the Argentinian side of the falls. We were particularly looking forward to this as it was meant to be even more spectacular than the Brasilian side.

This would effectively be our third time in Argentina, that was a mad thought.

It took us 5 hours to look around the national park on the Argentinian side, a lot of walking and a little train ride but we did it good and proper and we were totally `waterfalled out` by the end of it, but very satisfied. And again no rain until the very end of the day. It just goes to show that weather forecasts are totally and utterly crap, unreliable and very very wrong throughout the world not just in England!!

Everyone was right the Argentinian side was completely a million times better, you actually got to stand over Garganta do Diabalo, it was breathtaking (Again I have videoclips). Truly wonderful and unforgettable experience.

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Recent Messages

From Tom and lyn
Well you lucky bastards, it pisses me off so much when I look at the wonderful time you are having. Miss you loads and hope to see you soon!

Tom, Lyn and Jack
PS it's being pissing down with rain here and it's still bloody cold, I had to clear ice off my windscreen yesterday!
Response: Hi all,

Yep where we have just stayed was truly wonderful we felt like celebs having such luxury, not long till we are home now though.

See you all soon.
love Ian and Marge xx
From mary & ted
Ted cannot believe that you missed the chance to see the Rolling Stones in the flesh,you might have got a bit squashed if there were 2 million people there but thats a small price to pay!!!!! we read the postcard you sent to your Granny she was chuffed with it and is showing it to everyone.It wont be long now before your travels are over we hope it wont be too much of a shock to your system when you return to Buxton.Enjoy the Bahamas.lots of Love Aunty Mary & Uncle Tedxxxxx
Response: Hiya,

Glad that granny is enjoying the postcards. There will be no need for them very soon though, nearly at the end of our trip now. Apart from the weather we are looking forward to coming back home now, back to some normality and stability and no more scary flights! We will visit when we come home and bore and excite you with our many travel stories and pictures all for the price of a cup of tea for Ian and a bottle of wine for me!!
Lots of love margie and ian xxxx
From marmy
pictures lovely - it is not teu about the caravan although Mrs Posh Henry from Biggin Grange has compalined about it to us - says it disturbed her guests when they are playing tennis - can you believe it - percy pervert she is a married woman now !!!
Response: all I can say is what a cheeky snobby cow, I am glad that she didn't come to the wedding! I did tell you not to walk around naked anymore though mum! By the way on our private beach we can walk around naked and frequently do, we will have no white bits when we return!

love us xx
From Jo and Antonia
It's lovely looking at all your photos and hearing about your adventures. I'm really jealous to see all the blue skies, it's been freeeeezing here but spring seems to have finally sprung this weekend. As you will be well aware, it was my birthday yesterday (very disappointed about not receiving a card!! But I'm sure you were drinking my health last night! chuckle) Anyway, to celebrate, me, Antonia and my Mum went to see Chitty Chitty Bang Bang in Manchester. It was fantasmagorical....the car REALLY does fly!! The child catcher was suitably scary especially in his disguises! Hope to see you soon. Enjoy the rest of your trip! x x x
Response: Hi Jo,

I did think of you actually because your b'day is in my diary! HAPPY BIRTHDAY for the other day though. We will be sure to drink to your health tonight down the "Midway Tavern"! We are currently in the Bahamas and having a lovely lovely time, we love it here, the people are really friendly and the food is great.
Loads of love me and Ian xxx
From Al
Loved the latest pictures, and have to agree with you Marge, Jesus is a looker. Not quite sure but suspect we'll both go to hell now......
On a lighter note, am extremely jealous of your tan, but where's Ian's?
Response: Hi Al,

God weird I had a dream about you and Dave last night, then I come down here and find an email from you, very strange!
Glad that I have another fellow Jesus statue fancier!!
Don't worry my tan has really faded now, we have only a short time now to get me black again!!
Hope hopalong is getting better.
love me and ian x
From Percy
Marg - more bikini pictures please!
Response: She certainly will not, next time you see her she will be dressed like a nun!

From marmy
PS - it is called sugar loaf because in some parts of the world that is how people buy sugar in a sort of pointy shape which the mountain looks like - they then knock pieces off to use - like a giant , foot high bullet really - there , i am full of useless information !!!!! the large chunk of sugar is indeed called a "sugar loaf" any more questions ?
Response: Hi Mom.. can you guess where we are yet?!

Thanks for the info I knew you'd know why!

No more questions for now, apart from is Sara driving the car yet?
From marmy
the caravan is lovely - we have just watched a programme and they showed the iguazu fallls - very wonderful - are you going to angel falls ? stop drinking !!!!lots os love XXXX
Response: No we aren't much much to explain you will find out no doubt tomorrow when we try to call you again. We tried to call patrick a couple of times today we will try again tomorrow if possible coz we are on the move again.
From Tina
no the caravan is a disgrace right bunch of gypsies we're turning into or should i say mum and patrick are!!! ha ha. how clean is you;re house are around soon so i think we're going to nominate mum although she has threatened to kill me if i do!!! things are uneventful here just looking forward to italy now in 3 weeks. paul is on the case of replacing the "driveshaft" t-shirt he's gutted it's now dead especially since he was getting the Charlie look down perfectly!! anyway off to make a vat of pasta and pesto to see me though lunches this week. it was lovely talking to you the other day try to call again soon. only a month till you;re back then you can become a baby making machine yay!!!
love tina xxxxx
Response: No comment on the How Clean Is Your House, no doubt ours will be a total shithole when we get back so we can't say anything!

By the way today was a sad day as Ian had to leave the Drive Shaft t-shirt behind in favour of some brand new spanking Guess clothing!! Have you guessed where we are yet?!
We have had some right disasters recently and tears have been shed, but hopefully it is all sorted out now. We will try and update the website before we depart for paradise tomorrow.....
Love me and e x
p.s we will do our best on your last comment!
From Clare & Mick
Hello both,

We got back from 2 weeks in Sri Lanka yesterday. Had a wonderful time. It's a beautiful country with very friendly people. Can recommend it if you're planning another trip, although the language and the alphabet are a real challenge.

Enjoyed catching up on your escapades. Please tell me Ian wasn't living out his Coldplay fantasies again on the picture in Rio. I thought he'd grown out of that.

Looking forward to catching up when you return.

Clare & Mick
Response: Hello M&C,

Yeah Sri Lanka is meant to be very beautiful we will defintely have to check it out one day.

Ian hasn't embarrased himself too much recently apart from falling asleep in the hotel lobby the other day, a woman knocked on our door with Ian in tow and asked me "is this yours"!!

See you both soon.

Love marge and Ian xx
From marmy
do not think tina went to miami - be careful there the place is full of thugs !!!lovely to speak to you today - the phots of the falls are wondeful - is it true that you can hear the falls before you see them ? i must say the phots of you and ian are the beest so far - i like the one of you in front of the falls although you do not look too "weary" as you wrote in your e mail to stuart !!! take care love mumXXXX
Response: Hi marmy,

Yeah it was nice to speak to you too. Spoke to Tina she didn´t go to Miami but we will make sure we pick somewhere carefully and safe. Yeah I agree that the pictures of me and Ian are the best ones that we have to date, we are very happy with them.
Anyway only another 4 hours to wait for our flight, I may as well update the website some more while we wait....
Lots of love
margie xxxx
p.s. Tina didn´t have very good things to say about the caravan!!!!
From Percy
Iguazu Falls - the first photo Ian looks like a Geek!
Response: thanks. Ian
pot calling kettle black me
From Stuart Armstrong
We have been reading your "site" about your adventures - it looks and sounds fantastic! Are you missing "sunny England?!?!?!"

Just been in contact with your Mum - we will be staying in Liffs Cottage for a few days of Easter.

Hope to see you both soon - take care.

Stuart, Carol & Danielle.
Response: Hello all,

Yeah we are having a fantastic `Honeymoon` if you can call it that! We are a little weary now though and are looking forward to some relaxing beach time for our month in the caribbean!!!!

Have fun at the cottages.

Lots of love
margie and ian x
From marmy
about time too!!!what i s with all the sudden apostrophes- cafe's and taxi's -i!!! glad you are getting some sunbathing inbut would hate to look at your liver!!! your blood will be alcohol when you get back we will have to try to detox you then - take care lots of love xxxxx it was lovely to talk to you the other day
Response: I don´t know you know how crap I am at English! At least my spanish and portuguese is coming along though!
We are off the drink for a bit now as we are trying to lose some weight so don´t worry about our blood!
We are very very brown now, we will be possitively black when you see us next! We LOVE where we are at the moment a beautiful little village on the beach north of Rio, we love it here, we are even thinking of buying a plot of land here once the flat sale goes through!......
It was also lovely to speak to you at last, the last two times I have phoned you haven´t been there. Hope all is well, give granny a big hug from us.
Speak to you when we get to Miami probably next.
All our love
margie and Ian
p.s. did Tina go to Maimi on the way to Oz, does she know where the safe places to stay are??
From Percy
What email?
Response: never mind !
From Ali and Hoppalong
It'll be great to see you both when you get back and we'll be up to sunny Buxton as soon as you're ready to have us. Freya can't wait to pull what's left of Ian's hair out!

Response: Hi Al and Dave,

Ian cant wait to have the rest of his hair pulled by Freya, we will all look forward to it!!

Ian says `you cheeky cow!`

love us xxx
From Percy
Paul you Canidiot!

Trouble always follows..... You're dangerous man. Dangerous.
Response: Percy,

Why havent you replied to our email...
From marmy
hello you two - glad to see you seem to have left the madness behind !!! speaking of mad - i have got more forms , tried for 4 hours tonight to scan them but am thick so sara is helping me tomorrow so hope to be able to scan tomorrow (friday ) or saturday morning - sick off the sight of them - been to grasnny's today and she is very well - sends her love to ian for his birthday - if you do not want pissy how about vic ? a lovely little boy don't you think? am trying to find a home for pissy but am not having much love - the new static caravan is now in place and lookin fine - all i have to do now is pack - i just cannot get motivated to do it as there is so much - anyway take care - lots of love mum xxxxxxxxxx just to make you feel better - we are expecting bad snow again this weekend !!!!
Response: Yeah we did leave the madness behind for a while but keep on reading the diary as there is worse madness to follow!....
Nope don´t want pissy, I already have Ian!
love from us xxx
From Dade
Just to say it was a pleasure to catch up with the pair of you in Rio. Hope the weather was good and you are continuing the tradition of drinking cocktails on the beach.
Much Love Dade xx
Response: Hi Dadester,

It was Loverly to finally meet up with you and Janey too, we really missed you both when you left us though. Anyway we now have our other two friends staying in the apartment. We are keeping the side up and getting pissed down the beach most days at Andre´s. The weather has been fantastic since you left. Have a fab time in Oz, and say hi to the wife.

loads of love margie & Ian xx
p.s. why on earth did you decided to go back to B.A. and not stay here
From paul and tina
Well well old man we would both like to wish you a happy birthday. I know it must really suck being away in a warm country drinking cold beer and perving on bikini wearing gals but you'll just have to make due. GEt the sambuccas in ASAP!!!! NOw on a more important note ME.... Matt and i were in manchester lastnight and we did what me and you do best and missed our train home , so we got a train to maccelsfield and a taxi home. But thats when it all went wrong. As i do when im drunk, i went to sleep in the taxi when i heard matt say to me, brace your self cause we are gonna go. The taxi wiped out in the snow coming over the tops and smashed into a drystone wall and then did a couple of sommersaults and then landed on its roof. i smashed my face off of the seat busting open my nose. Only cause im tough as nails and didn't wear my seatbelt.....f--king idiot...Ha ha. Now im gonna see how good patrick is and do what my fellow americans woud do in a situation like this and sue........ Anyways have a wicked day and well talk soon

Paul and tina
Response: Hi Crashtest Dummy,

Oh my god, I can´t believe that you weren´t more seriously injured, you are so lucky. I bet you absolutely crapped yourself or were you to totally ratted to realise what was going on? What a nightmare, anyway we both hope that your nose is better and that it hasn´t ruined your dashing looks!
Once you get your compensation we can all go out for a pissup!
Take care of yourself from now on and of my sister!
Love margi and Ianxxx
From mary & ted
Finally after many mishaps managed to log on to your diary as you know we are not very computer literate!!!Havent read it all yet,but you seem to be having an exciting time.will send more messages with suitable comments when we have read it all.Look after each other.Happy birthday to Ian for tomorrow.Lots of love Aunty Mary & Uncle Ted
Response: Hi Aunty Mary and Uncle Ted,

I was surprised to see that you had been on to our website, I had no idea you had access to a computer, but thats great that you do.
We are currently in Rio, we didn´t go to the carnival as it was complete mayhem, Ted you will think that we are mad though as the day before the carnival started there was a massive Free yes Free Rolling Stones concert on Copacabana beach, (where we are currently renting an apartment for the week), you probably think we are mad for not going but there were 2 million people there and we didn´t fancy it!
Hope all is well with everyone, tell Jo to have a look at the site, I´m sure I´ve sent her the address but just check.
see you when we get back (very tanned of course!!).
love from Margie and Ian xxxx
p.s. Ian says thanks for his birthday mention.
From Hopalong
It's the middle leg. They've taken some length off because the doc said it was likely to cause some serious damage and I kept tripping over it!
Hope all is well,
Response: Hi Hopalong,

Thought so!!!! Hope you are getting better. We hope to see you soon after we get back. Remember its your turn to come and see us though as we will be totally skinto!

love Marge and Ian xxx
From Paul [& Helen]
Hello you two!!

Not been on for a while, still having trouble keeping up with your diary!!! Good to see you're back enjoying yourselves, expect you've been to Colonia and back by now!! Enjoy Iquazu!!

Catch you later!!
Response: Hi Paul and Helen,

The website has taken a backseat as we are now in brasil and topping up our tans, the reason we are soo behind though is all the bus journeys taking over days and days you know what its like!
We promise to update this week, hopefully to date.
love me and e xxx
From AL and Dave
hiya! we're now on broadband so will be able to keep a closer eye on you two menaces abroad. Dave has had an op on his leg so will henceforth be known as hopalong henderson. all well here, lots of love xxx
Response: Hey Al & Hopalong H,

Why has Dave had to have an operation, is it because his legs are too long? Next time we see him Ian is expecting to be taller than HH!!

Love marge and e x
From Natalie
Hi Margy & Ian
Wedding date is 16th July (Sunday). I'm sorting out my Hen do, when are you back hun?

Response: Hi Nat,

Wedding in diary, we should be back early May sometime, will contact you when we are home though.

love marge x