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John’s Travel Diary

Wednesday, 03 Apr 2013

Location: Louth, Lincolnshire, UK

MapIíve been quiet, but thereís not been a lot going on. Bridget and I drove successfully to Christchurch ( drove the last third of the way), and we all had my Birthday Tea together. Bridget caught the train back the following day, and I rested and slept for 2 days! Ė and that set a pattern. After such an auspicious release from hospital, we were all expecting me to be eating better, becoming more lively and active with each passing day. But it didnít happen. I stayed sleepy and terribly weak, and did very little. Eating better, for sure, but little else positive to report. On Good Friday we all drove over to Brighton: the girls saw their birthplace, and I established myself in Angel House overlooking the sea, and received visitors Ė which was really, really nice.

But thereís no point in kidding ourselves, least of all me kidding you. For all the pain and distress of the treatments, apart from making my eating easier (which is great, donít get me wrong), I have continued on a slow decline. I can only walk a few yards now, I canít drive except a short way round the block, I canít do photography or voice-over or play music. I might be able to draw, but only on a good day. This is not what Iíd hoped for. This is not a life.

The family organised themselves to ferry me back to the North on Easter Sunday. Mat and Sally drove halfway, we met up and Bridget drove me home. We saw my specialist today at Grimsby Hospital, and he said pretty much the same. Heís given me a new pain control regime (because the pain has been getting worse), and confirmed that thereís no further treatment they can offer or would recommend. Hey ho.

Weíre looking at the end of the road.

More soon